Baby #3!

This picture is of EMERALD...NOT baby #3. :)

Today was our first "semi" class to begin the adoption process. We have filled out the application and will start our official training next Saturday for the next 4-5 weekends. The classes are all in Los Angeles...so we may have to make a pit stop to the beach also. ;) I have been ignoring and pushing the promptings away that I have felt so strongly from the Lord since we have moved here. Once my life is in order and I find time to take up hobbies...the Lord tells me it's time to have another child! :) Always seems to work that way...

After having Charlie, I was "strongly advised" from my doctor to NOT have any more children. And strange as it is, I wasn't very upset by that. I knew that there is a baby #3 that belongs in our family...whether I give birth to that baby or not. I guess I should start at the beginning...sigh...here we go...

So with Emerald I had gotten very high blood pressure and was put on bed rest for about 8-10 weeks. Well, I didn't really do the whole "bed rest" thing exactly the way I should have... ;) Emerald ended up coming 3 weeks early and with only a 4 hour labor and delivery! It was fabulous...piece of cake!! :) My protein levels were high and both Emerald and I were at high risk. I had gotten toxemia and my blood pressure sky rocketed! With Toxemia, your body thinks of the baby as a foreign object and tries to kill it. So luckily Emerald was out fast. After that, everything was pretty much a blur. I remember how tiny she was when she was born...only 5 pounds! I will never forget the look on my doctor's face after the placenta came out. My heart stopped. He was so shocked and confused. My placenta was tiny (less than half the size it should have been) and hard and crusted over on one side. Emerald was losing her nutrients and therefore, wasn't able to grow. They ended up keeping my placenta for a bit to run tests and things. They had no idea that was going on in my body and it should have shown up on all the blasted tests they did on me before delivering Emerald! ;)

I felt fabulous after giving birth! I didn't tear at all and no stretch marks! YESSSS! I was put on Magnesium right after I delivered Emerald to help stabilize my blood pressure so I wouldn't have a stroke or heart attack because it was getting so high. The magnesium makes you feel like crap. So that was a bummer...and my blood pressure was so high that I was told to sleep all day, I couldn't breast feed or bottle feed Emerald (it was too stressful apparently) and I had to keep the room dark. Basically just had to CHILL to get that blood pressure down. I remember having the "baby blues" so bad during that hospital stay. I hardly ever got to see little Emerald and they kicked Jacob out of my room so that I could rest. I was given sleeping pills to make sure I didn't wake up to feed the baby and Jacob fed Emerald every 3 hours ALL day and ALL night while we were in the hospital. I was so emotional. It was like having this part of me just taken away. I went through A LOT of hell during those 9 months!! (I lost weight, multiple ER visits, depression) It was hard to have nurses tell me that I couldn't take care of my new little baby.

Anyway, when we came home, I was not to have visitors, had to keep the house quiet and dark, and couldn't feed the baby much on my own. It was a very difficult time. I was adjusting to being a mommy but at the same time trying to recover from this high blood pressure. I was so mentally exhausted from people being so worried and telling me all these things I COULDN'T do. I was put on some "water pills" and after about 2 weeks my blood pressure was down to normal! This is the story of Emerald's birth...and I've actually never written it down. It is very draining.

Charlie's birth was even WORSE. I don't think I'm up for that much tonight. :) To make a long story short, pregnancy and delivery is very hard on my body and so I am told not to take that risk again and at the same time, I want to be cautious and safe. But I know baby #3 is waiting. I've always had the idea of adoption in the back of my mind...I want a black baby soooo bad! :) So maybe baby #3 will be adopted or maybe I can put my trust and faith in the Lord that I can give birth to baby #3. We are starting with the adoption choice and seeing how that works out. I'm really excited!

The past little while the adoption agency has been receiving calls from the hospitals for newborns that need to be placed in a home right away. And they have to turn them down because all the houses that take in foster children are full! We have high hopes to get a little baby soon after the training is finished and we get the home inspection passed! I guess I will need to write Charlie's birth story some time, so hopefully I can get that done tomorrow. It's taken me like 1.5 hours to write this post...sheesh...I'm pooped! Good night Journal! ( and any other fellow readers...) :)